The act of beginning

Feb 14, 2020
Why did you pick up Krav Maga? Why did you start a blog? Why did you start meditating?...

How shall I indulge you with an answer, I say in reply? For it is the simplest one available! I did. Yet, as clear and obvious as it is for me, as murky and unconvincing is sounds to most everyone who asks.

There is always some logical reason, or at the very least thought out a bit. I could tell you that I started Krav Maga because I wanted to work on my reflexes, and self confidence in my physical abilities. And it would be true. Yet, it would not be the reason that I started. For I had first heard of this martial art 6 years ago and my motive would have been valid back then as well. Nevertheless it took 6 years for me to actually throw the first punch.

There is always an emotional reason, or at the very least a gut feeling. I was nostalgic for the olden days when I was typing in a browser or maybe disappointed at the other formats I'd used to communicate. Nevertheless, I had postponed the first word for years, and the emotion was different every time I pondered starting. On a windy day, a different reply would have been given.

Sometimes, the answer may even be spiritual or philosophic in nature. I did it for I wanted to explore a different state of being while tracing in the steps of a person I admire. Yet, that, or 50 practical and supernatural motives hadn't gotten me to even take that break for what now feels like an eternity before I actually embarked on this journey for the first 5 minutes.

In truth, none of those arguments is a lie. They all played a part in my mind at some stage, along with hundreds of others over long periods of time. For a practical comparison, have you ever split a page in two and listed a series of pros and cons for a certain decision? Which one, or which subset of those arguments are the reason you actually chose A or B? You're now weighing the arguments and selecting a few, even though all played a part, and even though the important thing now is going through that choice and exploring it... understanding what it means to you.

All I can say for certain, is the ideas of those acts (and many many others I partake in) were recurring ones, and eventually I deemed them important. I was part of a choice to begin them. And I did. The why, is no longer relevant. I now enjoy those as part of life, letting them take me where they may, and if the road turns out to be dark I will choose again, without overthinking, to stop and do something else.